Getting over heartbreak (and other problems)

Recently, I have heard the following said by some of the wonderful people in my life:

If only he loved me,

If only we could be together,

If only we lived in the same place,

If only I hadn’t slept with his best friend,

If only he would come back to me

If only he didn’t work so hard,

If only I had more time,

If only my boss wasn’t an arsehole,

If only I was married,

If only I could change his mind,

If only it wasn’t raining,

If only my child was gifted academically,

If only I weighed 63 kgs

If only I had a meaningful, well-paid job,

If only I had as many followers as Pioneer Girl,

If only I always said and did the perfect thing,

If only I had more energy,

If only my child didn’t wear such short skirts,

If only I had the discipline to write 30 pages a day,

If only I could live by the sea,

If only the sun was shining,

If only I was rich,

If only I had had a better childhood,

If only my child was happy,

Then I would be ok

I would be happy

I would be whole

Then my proper life could start

When people say those things to me, I want to hug them and sit with them until the tears end. Then this is what I want to say:

You are on this planet right now,

It is your turn to be here

One day your turn will be over

But today it is your turn

And you are OK

You are whole

You are not broken

You don’t have to fix anything outside or inside to be OK and whole and happy.

Happiness is not conditional on freedom from suffering

Your circumstances will never be completely perfect,

Your thoughts will never be completely perfect,

But know you are part of an infinite and intact wholeness that is already perfect

And always perfect

So get up

Stay in the game

Look after the body you live in

Feed it well

Be kind to it

Stretch it and strengthen it in the way it likes

Do what you have chosen to do with all your might.

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This soup is near perfect: quick, delicious and nutricious. It's now on our soup-roster along with butternut soup, leek and potato soup, tomato soup, chicken soup, thai coconut soup and the favourite bean and barley soup.


Nigella Lawson’s Lentil and chestnut soup

Ingredients

One onion

One leek

One carrot

One stick celery

Two tablespoons oil

225gm red lentils

One and a half litres vegetable stock

22gm tin of chestnut puree

Parsley

Double cream

Method

Chop and fry first four ingredients in oil.

Add lentils and stock.

Boil for 40 minutes,
Add chestnuts, boil for another 20 minutes.

Blitz, add cream.